subject line: you are not them, and thank God for that


seattle, wa

The minute I walked into that restaurant I knew you were different. It’s sad, but we live in a society that praises sexuality and applauds for all of the tiny waists one man can manage to hold on a Friday night. But not you.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve fallen prey to the boys of the night time and time again. I had grown painfully accustomed to living in the grey. Living in the grey looked like undefined boundaries, drunk late night phone calls, and conversations that were never meant for us...just hoping, waiting, wishing that someday these boys would grow into men who would decide to stick around for awhile. But not you.  

You are different. You waited to kiss me until it was right. You love talking about your family, and bringing me home to visit. You bring up boundaries and the promises you’ve made to your future wife. You hold open doors and buy me flowers and ask to stop at my favorite coffee shops. You reassure me and wipe away my tears when my past has come knocking on my heart. And now, only six months later, we are talking about what the future has for us. You are intentional, and you are not one of them. 

The good guys are out there. They don’t make their entrances grand. They’re rather soft, actually. But one day you will look up and he will be standing there with his kind blue eyes and big grin, asking how your day was. And then, for the first time in a long time, you feel like the luckiest girl in the world because he’s not one of them. It may have taken what felt like an eternity to arrive, but deep down you know you needed to grow first. You needed to make it through the mud because in the end, it was always him, and that’s the best thing you could have ever asked or hoped for.