subject line: not just another love story

 

Pennsylvania

He was the one for me. With his red hair and blue eyes and way of loving me that made me feel like I had met my knight in shining armor after waiting what felt like forever. I still have the notes he wrote to me, where he said he was the luckiest guy in the world to have me as his girl. Not only was I head over heels for him, but he was my best friend and could make me laugh and calm my fears. For twenty-one years, I had been searching for my restless and wandering heart to land and he was home to me.
But, boys are dumb and she came along and suddenly all those words about loving me were not true anymore. However, this story isn’t about him and her and me crying in the shower about who they are together now.
This story is about me finding the courage to walk away because I knew I deserve to be treated better. This story is about me taking a long look in the mirror and knowing myself well enough, to say that a guy who could switch so easily is not the one for you. This story is about finding the brave me, who looked at all my hopes and dreams with him for the future and put them away so that I would not second guess myself or feel like I was competing in the present.
A small part of me still wishes he would send me a text saying “I made the worst mistake of my life, choosing her over you.” But, that won’t happen, and I can sleep well, dried eyed and smiling, knowing while he made the worse mistake, I made the best mistake. Because, I finally learned to love myself and that’s the best damn fairytale I could ever wish for.