subject line: living depression.

 
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western massachusetts

Dear Depression -

I want to evict you, but I don’t know how. You used to make me feel like something was broken. Now you feel like a tumor growing inside of me. I hate you. But mostly I hate how you make me hate myself. I want to get better, but you keep telling me I don’t deserve to. You keep lying to me. Sometimes the lies are convincing. There are days when I don’t believe I deserve to get better, don’t believe I am worth working on, or those pills are worth taking. Sometimes depression makes life hard. Sometimes people think the depression is just an excuse, even me. I hate you. Expect an eviction notice soon.