subject line: still in denial

 

tennessee 

We’re supposed to be just friends, I don’t date people I work with anyways. It didn’t matter that we went on breakfast dates and spent every day together over spring break. I made a huge deal about us being just friends because he is three years younger than me and I was moving away after graduation.

Somewhere in between telling embarrassing stories and singing Panic! at the Disco in his truck at 2am, I got used to his good night texts and meeting in the parking lot at work to start our days with coffee and YouTube videos in his truck. I got really used to my place as DJ in the passenger’s seat, and if I’m being honest it was quickly becoming my favorite place. We both cried in his truck, sharing the messy parts of our hearts and exposing past mistakes. He was the first person I called when my niece was born and the person who was the most excited when I decided to stay here after graduation.

Maybe I lied to myself the entire time or maybe we shared too much of who we are, but now there’s another girl in my seat. I’m trying to hide my disappointment and jealousy, but I still look forward to his texts, even if they’re about her.