subject line: stuck.

 

nebraska

when i was in high school, i looked around at my small hometown and knew in my gut that it wasn’t for me. i swore up and down at the age of fifteen that i wouldn’t become just another dissatisfied small town girl.

fast forward: i have that beloved slip of paper that proves i owe thousands of dollars of student loans. i live in a different tiny town. i work at at desk that makes my back ache, but my heart ache more. i’m still young. i still run my mouth about how i could “never” stay in this town forever. but every time i send off yet another resume to be rejected, or peruse grad school applications, my heart lurches, the room spins, and i click that little x in the corner of the screen before i even begin.

i swore up and down i wouldn’t let anything stop me.

now i’m stopping me.
and i didn’t plan for that.