subject line: bittersweet deja vu.

 

pleasantville, ohio

Well... I wouldn’t be the glutton for punishment that I am without finding a way to get tangled up with him again...

He was in town and I went to see him play. And where else would we end up except a Saturday night (Sunday morning) at 5:00am. It’s our thing I guess.

Things felt almost different this time. But we’re in the same place as before, just a year and a half later.

I haven’t let it hurt me yet, but when I do, I pray for grace; grace, that I will not spew angry words into my heart for doing this to myself again. Grace, that I may let go if that’s what life has for us. Again.

May I learn to protect my heart a little better.

Even though, at the time, I was ridiculously happy being reckless with him.

So I guess also, may I remember just how happy I was, how content I was with this boy that I adore, so that down the road I will settle for nothing less than smiling like an idiot on the way home.