subject line: letting go of trying to fix my mom.


roswell, georgia 

My mom is mentally ill. An abusive alcoholic with a personality disorder, refusing treatment. I’ve spent my life taking care of her. Sticking up for her to family & friends, physically & emotionally picking her up off the ground. I’ve been on a roller coaster- her roller coaster, for 30 years- both riding in the back seat & trying to stop the ride.

I take care & help people for a living. I know what I should do. Doing it is another story. I can no longer take care of her, she sucks the life out of me. We haven’t spoken lately, but yesterday she asked for my mailing address. I suspect she is going to send me my baby book & other things from my childhood. She can’t deal with the fact that her two kids cannot be her lifeboat.