subject line: red dress.


philadelphia, pennsylvania 

I wish someone would have told me that those moments, the ones that make life so worth living will never be what you thought they are. You don’t end up gazing up at the clouds with prince charming when you learn to love. You aren’t acing every test when you learn to learn. You don’t go into a job and steal the show with your charm and your wit and your dazzling ability to make latte art.

You learn to love with boys who are too vulgar and not motivated enough. The ones who fall short from being the life changers you want them to be, but you can see it in their attitude. You learn by pulling all nighters and drinking way too much coffee. You’re shocked by how much coffee your body can handle if you just put your mind to it. You’re shocked that pulling all-nighters isn’t the way to learn after all. You adjust. You sleep. You wake up and rip the band aid off. You learn that you don’t get to steal the show at a new job. You’re part of a team. If you love the people you work with, the whole damn place will steal the show. You’re just one girl in one red dress making a latte with no beautiful art because it takes a damn long time to practice that, and you have trouble catching on.

You become the influence for the young kids in your life by sitting in blanket forts, telling them the truth. It doesn’t come through the sundaes you spoil them with. It comes when you’re the one who makes it known you’ll always be there. You get the chances and opportunities by taking times to fill out the most boring, tedious job applications. It doesn’t matter till you walk in and say, “I’m here. I want to work for you. I want to pull all nighters and look like a damn fool giving a presentation I’m in no way qualified to give for you. I want to be the one who you don’t stay up drinking with because instead we’re going for a walk. I’m leading. I’ll teach you to find shapes in the stars or the clouds. I’ll show you the good things in life if you let me. I want to be the one who learns to make people laugh first. I’ll learn how to be the one who makes dragons and rainbows and unicorns in steamed milk later. I have something pressing to attend to. You can teach anyone anything. If you want to hire based on attitude, pick me.