subject line: cheers, lovely.


los angeles

I was waking up next to her for almost three years. Three years of feeling you move closer to me under the blankets cause you were cold. Or half awake ask for coffee. I’d always get your coffee or you’d get mine after I had a long night at work. Those were always our sweetest moments together.

But you lost site of yourself somewhere. Now it’s been 6 months. Oh, funny thing that time is.
I saw you and both our faces lit up and it felt like both our hearts jumped right out of our skin and hugged so tight, they felt at home for a few moments. You were doing so well. I haven’t seen that true genuine smile take over your face like it use to in so long. I had fallen in love with your smile and those two big front pearly whites. I loved the way your smile curved on your face.

You told me of the places you’re going. How you’ve grown. How you finally understood God’s love and joy like I had talked about. My heart couldn’t take it. My heart was exploding and my face was feeling with tears. But the good kind, it was no longer the broken heart tears that stained my pillow case. But the kind that stained my skin as they move down the valleys of my face. You’re beauty was so true and radiate at that moment. I’ve never been more proud of you.

You told me you now know your worth. That’s all I’ve ever wanted. To see what I saw. To see what beauty I let overtake my heart for so long.

You thanked me for doing what I did. You told me you finally understood why I did it all.

It felt so so good hear that. I felt so proud. No time, no space will ever be able to take away that moment. Where your heart was pure and you had loved yourself the most in years. You never looked more gorgeous, my lovely.

But now it’s been just a few more months. You have a new girlfriend. And that smile is gone.

Please don’t give up on yourself.

Keep. Pushing. Keep. Going.